Brothers and Relationships
I've been thinking about brothers and relationships for a while. I'm wondering if brothers do really accept the fact that their sister has a boyfriend...Do they take it the way we (girls) react when we find out that our brother has a girlfriend? I realized that most brothers “say” they’re totally fine with it, when it’s the total opposite. The question is, WHY do they pretend to be cool with it while they KNOW they’re not. Why can’t they just admit that they don’t like the idea and don’t respect it at all?
Group 1
“Retarded sexist bro” - Brother makes it clear he doesn’t want his sister to have a boyfriend. If he finds out she has one, he almost opens fire on her. He believes he has the right to have a girlfriend. Sister doesn’t have the right to love.
Group 2
“Cool-bro Wannabe” - Brother who pretends he doesn’t accept the fact that his sister has someone. If he finds out she has one, the reaction would be worse than Group 1.
Group 3
"Cool brothers" - Ones who know how to respect their sisters choices and decisions she makes in her life.
I believe most of the men in Bahrain and the GCC in general either belong to Group 1 and 2.. Lucky are the ones who have understanding brothers.
Group 1
“Retarded sexist bro” - Brother makes it clear he doesn’t want his sister to have a boyfriend. If he finds out she has one, he almost opens fire on her. He believes he has the right to have a girlfriend. Sister doesn’t have the right to love.
Group 2
“Cool-bro Wannabe” - Brother who pretends he doesn’t accept the fact that his sister has someone. If he finds out she has one, the reaction would be worse than Group 1.
Group 3
"Cool brothers" - Ones who know how to respect their sisters choices and decisions she makes in her life.
I believe most of the men in Bahrain and the GCC in general either belong to Group 1 and 2.. Lucky are the ones who have understanding brothers.
What type of brother do you bloggers have?
PS: I’m not talking about relationships when girls are teenagers, I mean when they’re grown up in their twenties and having a proper relationship.
13 comments:
interesting my dear.
the last few lines were the most important actually
i think it depends on what kind of relation ship ur talking about.
and if brothers are 1+2 its their loss coz better be close and open minded where u get a sister who treats u like a friend and trusts u.
so in that way ull be sure that shes in no harm or danger inshalah.
what im saying, mature ppl, sometimes need some space, just to know how mature they are. or could be. with no guidens ...
but in our society, no ones, specialy girls, ever get to experiance that.
Y, I'm very proud to say my if you had to categorise them, my brothers would fall under Group 3... They're supportive and they understand who I am, which makes them understand the choices I make in life... They also trust that I have a good head on my shoulders and am not going to show up with some 300 lb trucker with tattoos all over his face... =) They know I'm more sensible than that...!
You really appreciate how wonderful it is to have such a close relationship with your brothers that you can talk to them about anything, especially the issue of boys and a boyfriend... It's such a shame that a lot of sibling relationships are hypocritcal in the ME where the boys can go around screwing who they like and the girls have to stay pious... Or that boys place such distrust in their sisters that they want to go screw around behind their brothers backs, which will eventually lead to him find out and well... it's a story we've all heard before...
But true, when you're in your 20's and you've had some experience in life, you're bound to meet someone you think is suitable for you... so why not tell your brothers? If you're smart about it and sensible, they will be understanding... So many doors are opened up to you after that - you can talk to them if you're confused or not, you can ask them questions about their own experiences and try to draw parallels to your own... and telling them is a big step, especailly (as in my case) if they're your older brothers, because if you've always been open with them it's hard not to tell them one more little thing about your life... Ahhh... remind me to tell you & lulz a story one day.... =)
This post made me a little sentimental for my brothers.. I am blessed, el7emdli'Allah... I hope everyone else out there has Cool brothers like I do... and if not, then give it time, maybe you're just not ready to have that kind of open relationship with them yet ...
Supernitfa!! Great post, it never occured to me how you'd actually categorise brothers into certain segments, i really agree with "seroo".
Frankly, the way brothers think mainly depend on the way they were raised by their parents. Imthe youngest and only girl in my family that consists of 4 brothers, so you have a clear idea of how much my relationship would be with them.
I take their advise in each n everystep i undertake, and I'm lucky to have brothers like them that look after me rather than those retarded ones whom even control their sisters lives. In my case, I put them in category 3 even though my brothers are very conservative, they'e mostly telling me that I should always do things logically with respect to the societys' reputaion stadards that each girl stryggles with I guess. They know who I am, and they trust me, and I'm proud of that fact..they even joke around that they'd strip naked whomever wants to take my hand and beat the hell out of him just for precautions lol, thankgod theyre only kidding..
I wish everyone would have this type of relationship, and I thank my parents firstly for this :)
How about you, in which category do you brothers fall into??!! ;)
Thnx Seroo and ..G.. for your comments..Although I must say, it doesn't always depend on how parents raise their children. My parents are of the cool type but sadly, my only brother falls into category 1. He's still a teenager I guess and he doesn't see it right and I hate that. But as long as parents are cool, to me they are the most important people in the world. They are the experienced ones. I hope my brother changes when he grows up.
no3ik - I agree with you. Mature people do need space. My brother can understand me in anything but this. He's not even older or more experienced than anyone.
I don't necessarily think it's down to the way your parents raise you - typically in the ME, our parents raise us not to have pre-marital relationships beyond friends between men & women, so that goes right out the window if you've got a boyfriend...
I think it's a lot of factors into one, including your educational background, your relationship with your siblings, your friends, your experiences, where you've lived in the world (yes, contrary to what everyone thinks, your opinions do change GREATLY if you live abroad for a couple of years), and a couple of other things I'm sure..
In my situation, it's also the fact that my brothers are who they are, which is far from what my parents are, and which is a defining factor in why they think the way they do... Not to mention I'm sure they've seen their fair share of friends' sisters' running around behind their brothers' backs that they appreciate it that I actually tell them what goes on in mine... That's some food for thought for you...!
Y - good luck with your brother... again, it's an age thing, give it time... he's still too young to think of his sister as a woman rather than just "his sister" =) quite sweet if you ask me...!
Seroo - Yeah, i think it might be an age thing. The thing is, he loves me too much that he can't see me hurt and I appreciate that, but yeah, i'm not a teenager anymore. I know what I want and who I want to be with. I agree that he sees me as "his sister" more than anything. Thanx 4 following up ;)
i believe that most of the brothers in bahrain dont support the idea that their sisters have boyfriends because they love them.
your brother is been protective because he cares about you and he doesn't wanna see you hurt.
if only u'd understand that :)
Thats also true supernitfah, and seroo too. Alot of factors are involved. Guess it all comes down to a "Brother's" or "sister's" character in the end..
And don't you worry supernitfah, your brother is still young and he probably needs some years to accumulate certain aspects of his character to mature :) i'm sure he'll understand how graceful and depending you are as a sister :)
you just made my day, when i saw my name on your blog list.. ;*
how come u don't comment?
i will ;)
oooooh ..my brothers are totally number 1
looooool ..
they're already tryin to catch me ridin dirteh ..loool
Freaks ..but i love'em nontheless
nice post
ThunderCAT
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